I had a dream recently that shocked me. I was at United in Peterborough, New Wine’s summer conference a few weeks ago. It was great to be there, seeing so many people worshipping Jesus, encountering God’s presence, receiving prayer and, I trust, being equipped for lives of worship and mission. For me, though, the thing that stood out most didn’t take place in a main session, seminar, or even in prayer. It occurred at night, in bed, while asleep in the camper-van that our friend Barry had kindly lent to us.

Revelation: Dying Girl

I awoke on the morning of 27th July 2022 having had a dream that was crystal clear and felt like it had lasted all night. My mind was stirred and my heart arrested. I wrote it down, trying to capture all the details. Here’s what I dreamed.

In my dream I saw a young girl, trapped and suspended in a tank-like cage. The child was only a few years old and had Down syndrome. This young girl, bobbing around in the tank, was called Grace. Outside the tank and above it was a group of aggressive gorillas and every now and then one would reach in and strike her. They’d do this for no apparent reason, other than boredom or entertainment. Each swipe would injure the girl, often drawing blood and sometimes taking chunks of flesh out of her fragile body. Many of the blows struck her head and would daze her, although she didn’t complain or cry. This was her existence – her ‘normal.’ It was all the life she knew, and I realised I was witnessing her death. I was revolted by what I was watching. It felt so unfair, unkind and tragic. And yet I was doing nothing. I passively looked on, observing the sickening, leisurely, brutal murder of a vulnerable young girl named Grace.

On awakening I spent time praying and pondering this dream about grace. It seemed to contain an unusually foreboding but important message – for me and others. Its significance was highlighted when, after breakfast, I picked up an as-yet unread book I had purchased the previous day, and began to read words which were uncannily similar to my dream:

‘Grace is the gift of creation given to humanity … You and I reflect God. When we look at people or when they look at us, we see a reflection of the God of Genesis 1. We are created in his image … A quadriplegic two-year old with Down syndrome possesses the image of God and therefore has infinite worth and value in the eyes of God, not because of what she does, but because of whom she reflects. Every human, every single one, bears the glorious image of the transcendent Creator.’ (P. Sprinkle: Charis, [Colorado Springs: David C Cook, 2013], pp.35-36).

The Lord had my attention. So I carefully considered the dream: its content, meaning and response, being convinced it carried a message about The Slow Death of Grace.

Interpretation: The Slow Death of Grace

The dream was about grace. Grace is generous love. It’s a love like no other, that I often describe as unconditional, undeserved and unending, and it’s most perfectly seen in the person of Jesus Christ, and mediated by the Holy Spirit. It’s what we’re made for – to give and receive.

The dream was about destruction. Harmful and inhuman forces were at work, toying with and playfully killing grace, contented to see her demise.

The dream was about people who are vulnerable. Children are amongst the most vulnerable in our society and, along with the elderly are so often inadequately protected from exploitation and forces of destruction.

The dream was about people who are female. Girls and women have, for too long, come second place to boys and men, being told they lack worth and often deprived of opportunity.

The dream was about people with special needs. We see so few people with Down syndrome these days, for most are aborted before even having the chance to take a breath.

The dream was about people doing nothing. It involved people sitting back and watching and being horrified, and yet doing nothing. And I was one.

Application: Questions & Action

This dream raised all sorts of issues for me about grace, which require a response. Some of them are questions, which I need to consider and resolve. Here are a few:

  • What is the state of grace in contemporary society?
  • Is grace trapped and under attack? Does the plight of grace need championing and liberating?
  • How should grace affect how we treat the most vulnerable in society?
  • While some things have improved for girls, does grace help us see what more can be done?
  • As we look through the lens of grace, does our vision of humanity include people with special needs, or are we going to continue to systematically abort so many in the womb?
  • What am I going to do about all this?

This last question is the hardest. Of course I have been praying about what I should do, and writing this blog-post has helped me reflect. But there is more, I am sure. I probably need to shout more about grace from the rooftops. Preach more about grace from the pulpit. Sing more about grace in my worship. Tell more stories of grace at the meal-table. 

Most of all, as a follower of Jesus, is my daily life overflowing with grace?

And as a church leader, is there a future preaching series to preach on grace? 

And as a writer, is there a book to write, on The Slow Death of Grace? 

A world bereft of grace will be dreary, dark and demonic. A world infused with grace will be caring, compassionate and kind. Which do I want? Which will I contend for? 

Surely I won’t sit back and observe the slow death of grace. Will I?